Ever since Facebook started allowing companies to “suggest” links in my news feed, I have been getting some awfully bizarre posts.
Today’s takes the cake. A company called Zaggora is offering me (and I quote) HOTPANTS (the capital letters are all theirs) that burn calories for you.
Of course I clicked on it.
C’mon. You would too.
“Zaggora fabrics,” the web page touts, “Heat you up WHEN YOU’RE ACTIVE (capital letters are all mine) and burn calories for you.”
Please correct me if I’m off base here, but aren’t those sweatpants? No?
Besides, if I understand the hype, the company’s soon-to-be-patented Celu-Lite fabric has an inner layer that traps body heat.
Waaaay back in the day, when I was a teenager in a regional ballet company, under our practice leotards we rolled ourselves in a fabric with similar properties. It was called Saran Wrap. All I lost was about a quart of water and every grain of salt I had eaten for the last month.
The ridiculous thing was that I mummified myself in plastic at all. I was a dancer, for Heaven’s sake and was already skinnier than the proverbial rail.
The satisfied HOTPANTS wearers on the Zaggora web site look like they might have been in pretty good shape to begin with, too.
I won’t be ordering any today.
But if you can (and I am almost quoting now) come up with a fabric that heats up and burns calories for me WHEN I’M SITTING IN A RECLINER WATCHING THE REAL HOUSEWIVES, then suggest away.
I’ll be all for it.
Did you ever fall for the Saran Wrap craze? Do you think this could really work? Want to try one pair and share it? Ewwww. What do you think? Please click on Leave a Comment below.